Sign on the Dotted Line
I'm beginning to believe that there should be a consent form that people have to sign before they get to know me on a deeper level than just acquaintances or mild friends. I am coming to the point in life where people begin to develop their own opinions and these opinions are being set deeper into stone. I do realize that it may appear that I am becoming more stubborn and more "abrasive", especially towards the people whose opinion I agree with less and less. So, perhaps, there should be waiver that people must sign or agree to before they really get to know me and it might look a little like this...

I, _______, understand that the following things could be unveiled about Melissa Cleaveland while getting to know her true personality and developing a meaningful friendship with her. I realize that my feelings may get hurt and I may not agree with her, but I will not hold her or any relating responsible for the irrational things that she says that may hurt me, challenge my beliefs, divide a line between myself and another party, or jeopardize any future relationship that I may have with Melissa. I understand that most of the opinions and feelings expressed by Melissa are mostly irrational, petty, and forgotten within a week unless a dire situation has occurred (i.e. death, destruction of property, destroying any of her deep relationships including but not limited to boyfriends, family and/or Cynthia). The following are examples of things that may be uncovered about Melissa and I agree to take with a grain of salt (unless salt is a substance that causes my blood pressure to rise which would incur death upon myself, then I'll take it with the weight of a feather):

1. Melissa is a stubborn individual who would be unable to rationally debate any subject because half the time she unable to she the other side of the story.
2. Melissa is extremely opinionated but rarely agrees with everyone in her surrounding area.
3. At certain times, Melissa tends to lose her temper irrationally. Usually, this occurs in time of high stress or extreme over-exposure to the same situations. This temper will subside after Melissa is alone for a while and cools down.
4. If you really piss Melissa off, then you will know. You probably won't be told directly what you did but you will know either through her mood towards you, other people, slamming doors, avoidance, tears, very long drives alone, or through an online journal. However, it does take quite a bit to actually piss-off Melissa to an extent where it's something to be concerned about; most fits need to be referred back to #3.
5. Melissa likes to be a loner sometimes. It is a characteristic developed at camps when younger. It doesn't not automatically mean that she is upset, mad, or planning a devious plot against you; sometimes it might just mean that she wants to sing to the radio at the top of her lungs with the windows down or be able to walk around naked (this is not an incriminating to either of those these acts).
6. Melissa is very protective about people/things that she cares about. If you mess with something she cares about, actions could be taken against something you care about. If you mess with someone she cares about, then you better watch your back. Either one of these case could cause a result of #4 caliber.
7. If you ask for Melissa's opinion, Melissa's opinion will be given to you whether it is what you want to hear or not. Melissa, however, does realize that you will probably not heed her advice and go in search of others' advice which is more along the lines of what you wanted to hear.
8. If you do not want Melissa's advice, you have a highly probability of getting it sooner-or-later anyways either directly, through word of mouth, or through her online journal.
9. Melissa does not always do the consensus of the group just to be with people. Melissa may not enjoy the activity taking place or may just not be up for the event. This should not be alarming and should not cause you to change your plans unless a request has been made; at the point of time a request is made, then you must make a decision and you may need to refer to #3.
10. Melissa is an odd individual that finds interests in subjects that many others may not find intriguing (i.e. medical situations, blood and its processes, evolution vs. adaptation) and some of the subjects may disgust you. If the subject at hand causes you to turn-up-your-nose, then just tell Melissa to be quite or not talk about that stuff. However, this power of your nose turning up should not be abused or you will lose this power.
11. Melissa occasionally ponders random questions (i.e. if she was in a coma for an extended period of time, would you shave her legs for her; if you didn't have any big toes, how often would you really fall over in one day and in what direction; what really is gravity). These questions can be answered at your discretion; this is just a warning that questions of this nature does occur and you should not be alarmed.
12. Melissa has the tendency to walk around in her underwear right before getting into bed regardless of who is in the room (with exceptions to males); blame this on 4 years of living in the dorm and being related to sisters that are not modest in the slightly sense of the word.
13. Melissa does not express emotions very well and does not confront someone directly when they have upset her; it is simply not her method of dealing with her emotions.
14. Melissa is slightly OCD. She likes things done a certain way, in a certain order/method, and it isn't right will keep doing the thing until she gets it right, especially if it is something that she is passionate about.
15. Melissa is not an expert at any kind of grammer or pronounciation. Melissa also has the tendency to make up words to songs if she does not know or understand the correct words.
16. If you get to know Melissa at a deep enough level to get to know her family, an additional waiver will be issued discussing the quirkiness, the dry humor, the subtle mocking, and the flat-out weird things that may occur within the inner workings of the Cleaveland family and close relatives. For reference on whether or not to venture into this area of relationship, please refer to Cynthia.

I understand the above points about Melissa and am willing to accept them and abide by any advice given in them. I also realize that this is not even close to half of the things that make up the complex individual that makes up Melissa; there are many more things about this intriguing specimen most of which are happy-go-lucky situations, scenarios that if taken out of context or performed by anyone else could be merit for a trip to a padded room, trips for ice cream, a partner in the what should be considered a crime of taking over a playground from the age group it was intended for, random gifts of apology for her being a dumb a**, deep/inspiration discussions, rational advice, and random knowledge that you probably would not hear from anywhere else. By signing this, I understand that I may learn these things about Melissa and will not be alarmed or extremely angered. I also acknowledge that I have not developed a relationship with Melissa before the beginning of August 2001 (which is the beginning of her freshman year of college) because I realize that if I have began a relationship or have developed a relationship with Melissa before this time and am still friends with her and haven't realized these things, well then I'm just oblivious to everything and am just out of any luck in trying to get out of the relationship.

Sign: X _____________________________

Maybe this would help people from getting pissed at me for being myself. But then again, if I had to give this out to everyone I met, I either wouldn't have friends at all or my only friends would be the weird people that like to push their luck with life. Perhaps people should come with their own warning labels, but then again that would make life rather dull and boring; there would never be any drama, or celebrations, or cat-fights, or any human passion; instead, everyone would walk around not getting to know other people because they're too afraid of each other. I'm also beginning to see why my sisters are beginning to think that I'm a very angry individual since this is their greatest outlook onto my life. It's not that I'm angry at the world or even angry half the times that I'm writing these things; it's simply that this is one of my only outlet into my deep inner thinkings/feelings. I'm just not very good at expressing how I feel to other people in an direct contact situation, besides half the time it doesn't really matter. These meanderings were started as an outlet for me to get things off my chest without forcing someone to listen to me or so I don't have to listen to someone else's advice on the matter or just me ranting. I don't mean most of the things that I say, its just how I feel. And, if you read these, please don't take them personally and, after all, it was your own choice to read it, I didn't make you do it. Most of these meanderings are meant for me anyways in a sort of self-discovery that most people do when they're in their early 20s and about to graduate from college. If there is a writing meant for some particular reason/person, this person knows what to take seriously, when to read it, and, I like to think which is probably a fault of my own, already knows what she did to piss me off; and this particular person knows how stubborn I can be and hopefully I'm beginning to open up more to this person when I get angry. So if I upset you with something in here, I would say I'm sorry, but I don't feel that I should be since I didn't make you read it and the comments were probably directed at me more than you.